Back in the day, there was a movie by the same name. I believe Mel Gibson starred in it while he was still loved - likely after Braveheart and before his anti-Semitic "The Jews stole my Christ movie" comments. Anyway, in the movie he had special powers. He could hear what women were saying - at least what they were saying internally to themselves.
I wonder what we'd hear today if we had the same powers.
The assumption that what women tell themselves is actually not supportive may be true, at least sometimes. It may be very true depending on where you live, your age, your financial circumstances, how you were raised, and what other people told you to believe. It may be true if you have access to the majority of the media and advertising we're constantly exposed to.
However, to say that the only thoughts running through women's heads are negative is a huge lie and disservice.
For the purposes of this post though, go with me. I want to point out the fact that when this stuff comes up, we can tell a new story. So, if (and I trust that the ifs are turning in favor of us being kind to ourselves) these are things we may be saying, here are some ways to reframe any limiting beliefs.
In the bathroom:
- Does this body make me look fat?
- My face is aging daily. At this rate, I'll be a crocodile.
- If only I were taller, skinnier, prettier, more white, tanner, more black … and on and on and on…
Instead…
- I know that I've got the goods and I know how to work them.
- Wow, I fill out these jeans. Thank god I've got such a healthy appetite!
- Thank you for making me unique - my best features are my …
*Extra credit. Take 30 seconds (that's it) and look into the depth of your own eyes. See the innate wisdom. Feel the part of you that is regal, that is divine. You are gorgeous, you are kind, you are powerful.
In the boardroom (because 99.9% of the time we are the only woman in it):
- These guys don't know anything about my market or offering yet they've got all the power to fund my idea. I'm sick of constantly pitching. I'm done with them!
- I bet if my name was Jeff or Mike and I had a hoody and a crap idea they'd write me a check today.
- I'm definitely not going to respond to that comment about how good I look in this dress and why my husbands lucky to come home to me. And WTF? That has absolutely nothing to do with negotiating this deal.
Instead…
- I am here because this opportunity can uniquely grow a customer base that can support many of their portfolio companies as well. And, because our offering actually addresses the core problem, we truly differ from the market. Plus, we can make a ton of money together.
- Someone in this room will see the value we bring and recognize that we are the only company that has cracked the code. Investing in us will bring on average 35% higher returns with 20% less capital (Fact and this is one of many articles that show that women consistently provide higher returns). They will see we are the better investment.
- Yes, I know I look good. That's exactly why I wore this power dress. I've also got the brains, talent, concept, business model, and team to pull this off. If my presence is a distraction and they can't see that, then they're definitely not the partners for us. When we partner, especially with investors, we are basically committing to marriage. We want smart money and more importantly, we want to align with them and their values.
*Extra credit. Before you walk in the door, remember your worth. When you're in the room, remember to lean back. You know what you're bringing to the table and you're also assessing them. Are these people you want to be partnered with for the long haul?
In the bedroom:
- If only he'd think about satisfying me…
- Why is this taking so long?
- When will I feel like a goddess again? Or, will I ever?
Instead…
- Babe, will you do all those things that you're really good at?
- I can use this time to practice my breathing and actually get into it. Or, what a gift to have this time together, uninterrupted.
- Yeah baby, I'm hot, I feel like a champion. I know I'm wanted and worthy. I love being the sexiest woman alive!
*Extra credit. Ask, ask, ask… and RECEIVE!
The Law of Attraction says this moment is the pivotal point for what we experience in our future. Decide what we want to experience. It talks about forward feeling rather than being mired in what is especially when we focus on what we don't like about our current situation. What we're feeling now determines what's going to show up next. And language is the best way to predict our future. If everything we experience is based on a story we tell ourselves, let's use our head talk to talk us into the life we want.
Because I believe what women want is the permission to want and the courage to expect that we'll get that which we desire.
So, I'm giving us permission.
Let's become our own storytellers crafting tales of heroines that are the constant recipients of love, success, riches, and bucket list experiences. Let's tell the story of how we came to power, one glorious want at a time.